Keep it simple. Period.

Last night driving home from an art opening in Chinatown, I had a moment of sheer joy.  I was simply driving, talking to my husband next to me and it hit me, bliss.  It doesn't take much to make me feel fulfilled.  I think it's a gift.  I've learned a lot about non-attachment from my life partner, about letting go and not joining in the drama.  I'm by no means perfect at this practice.  I definitely can get pulled into the misunderstandings and gossip, but I find as time goes on, it happens less and less.  I still feel a wide range of emotions; anger, frustration, disbelief, sorrow, but I'm able for the most part to acknowledge, accept and release the emotions before I deal with the situation.   

To acknowledge, accept and release my emotions, writing how I feel is quite useful, as well as taking a deep breathe before responding in a trying situation.  Sincerely though, it's my daily practice that keeps me on an even keel and able to use these small tips and maintain my dedication simple living.  When it's all said and done, what do we really need to be happy?  For me the list is short; a healthy body and mind, nourishing food, a clean home space, a balance between work and play, mental stimulation, creative outlets and good company.  People who I share values with and who teach as well as inspire me to be a better person.  I think that's a pretty short list!  Simple.

Island winds

Last night while hurricane Iselle was moving across the Big Island, winds began to pick up here on Oahu.  Our knee to ceiling windows normally reveal clouds sweeping across a variety of shades of color and palm trees swaying in the gentle breeze, they are normally a joy to look out of.  Well yesterday the windows became a great source of stress.  If the worst-case scenario happened and wind of 70 mph whipped past our home, who knows what could come flying through those windows!  I had trouble sleeping last night, which tends to happen to me when winds are strong. 

Often as the trade winds pick up I find myself piling blankets on top of myself, covering as much skin as I can to protect myself from air moving over my skin, much to the amusement of my husband who cannot believe that even in the tropical heat I can stand multiple blankets on my body or the fact that I sometimes I climb into bed at night with cold hands and feet.  Those of us who live with anxiety or a Vata constitution may relate to my plight.  There is something especially unnerving about wind, especially when one is already uneasy.  Over time, I've had to figure out strategies in order to live with the troubled sleep that accompanies my anxiety. 

There is an eye pillow on my nightstand, so that when I wake up in the middle of the night, I can place it on my eyes and practice relaxation techniques.  The first technique I use is a pranayama practice.  I inhale the first half of the breath into the front of my body (think lungs and abdomen) and then the second half of the breath into the back of my body (think low back and the space between the shoulder blades), then slowly exhale all the air out.  Try not to worry about the amount of breath moving in and out of the body, remember no strain!  Once you figure out how to access the back body this practice is divine.  Additionally, I count down my breaths.  Inhale count 50, exhale 49, inhale 48, exhale 47, inhale 46 . . . Repeat a few times if needed.

Well last night, for whatever reason, maybe I was too groggy or maybe the wind was just too loud, I totally succumbed to disturbed sleep.  So in order to ensure that this nights sleep will be restful, I got up this morning and practiced asana, and made sure to include specific postures I know to relieve anxiety and excess Vata.  I took plenty of joint rotations, was hyper aware of my connection to my feet and the ground in all standing postures, took forward folds and plenty of postures on my abdomen to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system.  So looks like I'll be having sweet dreams tonight!

Communication, my final frontier

 

When it comes to communication, I think there are two kinds of people in this world, people who express and people who repress.  People who cannot help but speak their minds and others who stuff their sentiments deep down inside.  I am definitely part of the suppressed, stifled and internalize-r club.  I might be the team caption. 

This being said, I think it is curious that I find communication and language study to be mesmerizing.  This year in grad school I was introduced to the world of pragmatics- the study of the use of language and the context in which it is used.  It is a broad field that investigates the transmission of meaning through language, verbal and non-verbal as well as face-to-face and via the computer.  It encompasses the relationship of the speakers, the intent of the speaker, the environment in which the communication occurs, and so on. 

One topic in pragmatics that intrigues me is evasion.  In speech, evasiveness occurs when the answer to a question is irrelevant or simply does not answer the question.  Some one asks you how your job is going and you say, "My cat did the craziest thing the other day!" or you simply state, "Let's not talk about my job."  While the strategies involved in the responses are different, the message is the same.  The person is avoiding the question and THAT is when things get interesting. 

So that got me thinking, if we regularly evade responding to direct questions, how much else are we avoiding in our lives?  One of the yamas, the personal practices of yoga is satya- truth in thought, word and deed.  So just as in pragmatics where the how and why of evasion is studied, I think it is important to study what we are evading in all areas of our lives.  If we don't look at what we are avoiding, whether that is problems at work, in our bodies, with our friends and family, with our finances, we are not really practicing satya.  This is a fierce practice.  So brave up!

Obviously, I am continually working on communicating with honesty and kindness rather than burying my emotions and problems.  I am lucky to have relationships that have helped me along the way.  Those who know me best can often be heard saying things like, "I cannot read your mind",  "Talk to me" or "What is wrong?".  And I am doing my best to talk.  I'm doing my best to look into those dark places that I try to avoid with love and a whole lot of compassion.  It's a process.  But I know the benefits that have come to me when I've faced my fears in the past, and that's what keeps me motivated.  Maybe someday, I'll even give up evasion.

If your yoga is not changing you . . .

Inevitably when I am in conversation, getting to know someone, yoga will come up.  No surprises here right?  The older I get, the percentage of my life that I've been studying, practicing and teaching yoga increase.  I'm almost at the point where I've been living  yoga for half my life.  Considering how often I've changed my job and where I live (amongst other things) yoga has been a constant in my life . . . one of the few.  You know when your dad introduces you to his friends as 'the wanderer' that perhaps consistency is not one of your strengths.  It's true though.  I love change and I love adventure.  I'm always up for exploring new spaces and new ideas.  That all being said, I find it intriguing that I've stuck with this one thing for so long. 

Like so many long-term practitioners, I've had many different relationships with my practice.  In the midst of a deep depression, my practice was a place that I came to for light.  In the middle of uncertainty and change, my practice was a place that I found steadiness.  Certainly, when my body and mind have been healthy, my practice has brought me insight and bliss.  Along this path there have been times that I really didn't feel like coming to the mat.  Times that I was avoiding myself or doing my best to ignore that nagging voice in my head that was telling me that no matter what, practice would help.  The Yoga Sutras perceptively call these situations 'the obstacles' and there is a whole list of them.  

"Disease, dullness, doubt, carelessness, laziness, sensuality, false perception, failure to reach firm ground and slipping from the ground gained - these distractions of the mind-stuff are the obstacles."  It's a handy list to refer to when your practice has become a chore.  I find that there is always something to discover when we encounter resistance to practice.  It's a time to dig deep, to uncover the cause of the struggle, some truth that we need to explore and accept.  Through this process we are given the opportunity to discover our strengths and know ourselves a bit better.  Sometimes, all we need a little adjustment in our perspectives or even in our practice.  

Recently I spent some time in WA teaching and practicing.  It was incredible.  I felt really connected and inspired by the practice.  Once I returned to Honolulu I hit a slump, I thought about it and realized how much I had been missing not only a community to practice in but also a deeper connection to the physical side of yoga.  I've always been a pretty heady and private sort of person, studying the Sutras, pranayama and practicing the majority of the time at home.  So, lately I've been motivated by the physical aspect of the practice.  I've been in the studio almost daily and when I don't make it there I'm at home exploring new asana.  Once again I am incredibly inspired by the practice and am amazed that I continue to learn and grow in my practice.  I'm feeling pretty stoked.  So, I'll wrap it up with the wise words of one of my teachers Melina, "If your yoga is not changing you, change your yoga".  

Satchidananda, Sri Swami. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali.  Integral Yoga Publications, Buckingham, 2008.

Prana Part I

Prana.  There are a million ways to describe it: chi, essence, life force, energy, flow, vitality, vigor, vivacity, animation, dynamism, liveliness . . . Sometimes it is easiest to understand when we put it in a context.  Think of a time when you felt truly alive, inspired and energetic.  You probably were well rested and well fed.  Wherever you were, you were happy and content with whatever you had.  I can almost guarantee that your prana was well cultivated at that time and in balance. 

So while some of us are interested in keeping our ojas well stocked so that our tejas once lit can keep prana flowing, others may say, that is enough Sanskrit for one day, I lost you after prana, can we just go back to talking about prana?  Just hang with me for a second longer and we'll head back to how to cultivate prana. 

Ojas, tejas and prana are what David Frawley terms as "the essential or beneficial forms of Vata, Pitta and Kapha that sustain positive vitality . . . they promote health, creativity and well-being . . ." (87).  So if we were to take the essence and positive qualities of the three doshas, that's what ojas, tejas and prana are.  Ojas (related to Kapha) is primal vigor, it is a reserve, the base for endurance, responsible for nourishing and grounding.  Tejas (related to Pitta) is inner radiance, it is vitality, it digests our experiences and allows us to unfold.  Prana (related to Vata) is the primal life force, the directing intelligence behind all functions, the great coordinator of mind, body and spirit, responsible for evolution and harmonization. 

Fantastic!  Great!  I want all of these qualities!  So how do I get them?  I believe Buddhism nailed this one with the Noble Eightfold Path.  Right view, intention, speech, action, livelihood, effort, mindfulness and concentration must be cultivated if we are to have any chance at finding inner peace.  Ayurveda adds one more complex piece to the puzzle.  Right lifestyle.  This is unique to you and you alone.  The right lifestyle for you is individual, the amount of sleep, type of work, creative outlets, movement and social interaction, as well as the type and quantity of food, drink and herbs is your responsibility to understand. 

I like to think of myself as a scientist of my own great experiment in life.  I try my best to stay detached and rather than assume that my actions are bringing greater ease and inspiration into my life, I try to observe my actions and their consequences.  As much as possible, I respect what I observe and make changes in my lifestyle to reflect what I need.  Not so easy because as we all know, the only constant is change.  This is not to say that I don't have patterns because I sure do.  I can pretty much guarantee to you all that my imbalances always start with anxiety, fear and ungroundedness and I know now how to get myself back into balance fairly painlessly.  When we are in balance, we can easily cultivate prana.  Prana is cultivated through maintaining a right lifestyle.  We gain it from the foods we eat as well as through all of our senses.  When we are in balance we can more easily cultivate prana because we take it in with every breath we take.  So find a lifestyle that makes you feel alive and ojas will create tejas which will create prana. 

Yoga & Ayurveda. Lotus Press, Twin Lakes. 1999.

30 day ayurvedic cleanse results!!!

Well, he's done it once again.  My good friend Jesse completed his 30 day cleanse, this time integrating some Ayurvedic wisdom and he has reported back on how it went.  I'd like to share some of his experience. . . 

 

*  After a week without caffeine and sugar, his energy level remained constant and stress level remained low.  He was better able to hear when his body was hungry or thirsty and found himself not eating or drinking when he really didn't need it. 

* He is off the caffeine in the morning!!!  Those are his exclamation points, not mine.  He's grown quite found of the delicious master cleanse drink, a concoction of lemon, cayenne and some sweetener, that he claims helps with phlegmy-ness in the morning and has been drinking fresh ginger slices and hot water as an alternative to coffee.  Both fantastic ideas for anyone wishing to substitute coffee and/or move Kapha phlegm out in the morning.

* Jesse mixed up some Ayurvedic herbs, following my instructions and found them painful to drink.  This is a common experience as many Ayurvedic herbs have a very bitter taste that us Westerners are not used to in our diets.  After taking Ayurvedic herbs on the regular for the past several years I can say that you get used to the taste :)

* He tried three Ayurvedic daily rituals, the neti pot, tongue scraper and abhyanga (oil massage before shower).  While the neti pot is not his cup of tea due to a general uncomfortable with water in his nasal passages and excessive dampness, Kapha, he is sold on the tongue scraping and abhyanga.  He did note that yes, morning ritual is time consuming and I completely agree.  My philosophy: pay now or pay later!  Also, as you get more attuned to how you are doing on a daily bases, you know which parts of the morning ritual you can skip and which ones you need to include to stay in balance. 

 

* As Jesse eschewed processed foods, he noticed that sweetener is in all processed vegetarian food.  He says he is cooking a lot more with all fresh ingredients and this helps him stay aware of the food he is actually eating, power of choice as well as proportion. 

* Finally, he thinks that it sounds like a good idea to have a cleanse at the beginning of a season and I couldn't agree more!!! He says he will definitely have this routine in January, and maybe again around the change of seasons for summer.  You go!!!

P.S.  If you are feeling the need for some Ayurvedic inspiration, Jesse recommends Tastes of Ayurveda and The Modern Ayurvedic - both by Amrita Sondhi

Where ever you go, there you are.

"Generally speaking, we regard discomfort in any form as bad news.  But for practitioners or spiritual warriors- people who have a hunger to know what is true- feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we're holding back.  They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we'd rather collapse and back away.  They're like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we're stuck.  This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it's with us wherever we are."  ~Pema Chödrön

People often talk to me about starting a home practice or starting to meditate like it is some big complicated thing that they will never be able to do.  Let me tell you, everyone can!!!  Sincerely.  

Recently,  I had a conversation with a person who told me they wanted to travel to a place half-way around the world so they could be in a specific place, with a specific practice that they knew would be great inspiration to start their meditation practice.

The beauty of Pema Chödrön's words state what to me is becoming more and more obvious.  Where ever you go, there you are.  There you are, with everything you need to practice.  Every moment, every emotion that you feel, every experience you have is a chance to dive in and explore or to run away. 

This weekend I tried to go to a yoga class.  I wanted badly to have someone lead me.  I arrived at the studio and no one was at the desk.  I waited.  Eventually, I left.  As I was biking home I felt a deep sadness, disappointment, frustration and a longing to connect in a community.  I had motivated, tried to do something good for myself and it didn't work out.  So I came home, rolled out my mat, laid down on my abdomen on the surface and let myself be sad...just for a minute.  I accepted it.  Then I started to breath, deeply.  I let my abdomen fill and press into the ground.  Then I started moving. 

That's the thing about life.  It just keeps happening.  The more we fight our experiences, the more they harm us.  The more we are awake to the experiences, our ever changing emotions and thoughts that go along with them, the easier things get.   

Like Swami Satchitananda said, "You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf." 

Ups & downs

Sometimes things are hard.  Too hard.  Hard for long enough that you start questioning how it is that you ended up where you are.  What were all the seemingly insignificant choices that you actively made, or let be made for you that brought you to the time and place where daily existence is a constant struggle?  I've been here before.  I am hopeful I will not be here again.  The difference is that after years of doing it the wrong way, I think I am figuring out how to cope in more of the right way.  In the past I have totally shut down, lost my center and allowed myself to become completely depressed.  That was before I had any tool bag for coping when things get tough...  

 So what's the big problem you may think?  What could possibly be wrong for someone who lives in a tropical paradise?  Somehow, my active choices have gotten me in way over my head.  For someone who consciously has chosen balance and everyday well being above all else, it seems absurd that I have not taken a full day off for over a month.  I have put in at least 60 hours of work a week, often more like 75.  I look in the mirror and I think, how is this lifestyle reflective in any way of my values?   

If I were talking to someone else, I would be asking them what their exit strategy is.  Fortunately for me, I already have one.  If something is deeply not working, not in line with your values, get over any expectations you may have placed on yourself and make a change.  If you need to stick things through for awhile before that change will happen, somehow you'll have to make peace with the fact that it is okay to feel frustrated.  Things can be tough and you can still be okay.  My mantra lately has become, this is only temporary, see the big picture.  As was brilliantly stated to me this morning by my beautiful husband, "You are not supposed to like things that are hard, that's why they are called hard."  Which brings me to another point.  Don't suffer in silence.  I mean don't use your friends as a punching bag, but things don't have to be good all the time and it is okay to admit that things aren't great.  I think when we resist strongly certain emotions it means we haven't fully accepted them.... so I guess I have found a few more things to add to my list of things to accept!

So where is the light at the end of the tunnel?  In 12 weeks this experiment into ridiculous work hours is over.  I will have accomplished something I didn't think was possible, something that has brought me to tears and lead me to see and know myself more intimately.  I have learned a lot about myself and where I see myself in the future.  So, I will do my best, I will undoubtedly continue to be challenged and pushed to my edge, and hopefully, that is where I will see some truth.

10-day detox results

Well, my 10-day winter detox is over!!!  As always, it was quite informative.  Each season has a Dosha that will get out of whack, that accumulates and then shows up as physical, mental or emotional symptoms.  Winter, is Kapha season.  Signs that Kapha is out of balance are lethargy, sadness, weight gain beyond the normal few pounds we all pack on during winter, congestion, slow digestion, the list goes on and on!  It's normal for all of us to experience a bit of the above listed symptoms during Winter, and more likely for those of us with Kapha dosha (raises hand!).  That's right ladies and gentleman, I am a proud member of the Vata-Kapha club.  So I get nailed with imbalance for two seasons in a row.  Straight from anxiety producing autumn to depression filled winter....

JUST KIDDING!  I love Autumn, I have so much energy (which some people might call deranged Vata)!  I also appreciate that Winter tells me to rest.  Speaking of resting, one of the insights I gained over my 10-day detox was how fatigued I have been.  We moved from Seattle to Honolulu in August and it has been non-stop since we step foot on this Island.  New city, new job, grad school, new community, change, change, change.  My Vata spirit loves change!  However, Vata girl + Vata season + Vata lifestyle = Vata imbalance.  Oh, I also flew from Honolulu-LA-Chicago-West Palm Beach-LA-Honolulu in 10 days over my school and work break.  Nothing like flying to amp up your Vata.  So, back to the point. 

I was completely exhausted.  So even though my life was as busy as ever during the detox, I drank herbal tea.  I took naps.  I religiously abhyasa'd, something that can go out the window against my better knowledge when I get busy.  Note to self: make sure to abhyasa & get enough sleep!  Another thing I noticed was that wheat isn't digesting well for me in the morning, wheat is a Kapha inducing food.  So I will forgo the toast and stick to eating rice with cinnamon, cloves and cardamom for breakfast at least until Kapha season is over.  By the way, after 10 days of a simple diet, I find I don't want the extras and I am not craving processed food.  Vegetables taste divine simply prepared.  I also had a cup of coffee that was the most delicious thing I have ever tasted, and appreciated its power to make me focus (it makes not interesting things interesting!!!).  Decisively, 10-day detox diets always teach me something, and help me to slow down and simplify.

Sadhana in the midst of chaos

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the importance of practice.  For a teacher of yoga, I think it is necessary.  When we feel good, we practice.  When we feel bad, we practice.  When there are a million other things we "should" be doing we practice.  Part of the reason I think it is important to practice as daily as possible as an instructor has to do with authenticity; walk the walk, practice what you preach, all those mottos come to mind.

 

This week was completely insane.  Actually, let me back up, the past few weeks have been completely ridiculous.  I have been burning the candle at both ends, waking up at 6am and working until near midnight.  Weekends?  They haven't really existed, that is to say, I take it easier, squeeze in a surf session; but still put in at least 5 hours a day of work.  Normally, I wake up, do asana, pranayama and meditation in the morning, or do my whole practice when I get home from campus. With so much to do and so little time, I had to get creative on how to work my practice into my life.  Rather than sitting on my bolster in my living room, I decided my daily meditation this week would occur biking to campus and then from campus to home.  Thich Nhat Hanh writes on moving meditations in his book Being Peace,

            "Walking meditation is really to enjoy the walking.  Walking not in order to arrive, just for walking.  The purpose is to be in the present moment and enjoy each step you make.  Therefore you have to shake off all worries and anxieties, not thinking of the future, not thinking of the past, just enjoying the present moment." (110-111)

So, I took this passage to heart and tried a biking meditation.  It was delightful and necessary with so much happening in my life.  

 This week will be less hectic.  I will be able to get some decent sleep and get back on my cushion.  I will not forget however, to clear my head while biking.  Leave what ever has happened in the morning as it is on my way out the door and breath with a wide, spacious mind on my bicycle, not worrying about what is to come when I arrive at my destination.  In my mind, the more moments during the day we can clear our heads and breath, the more our deeds are in line with our values, we say and do what we mean to.  The more we are present the more opportunities we will have to observe beauty and appreciate all that is good in our lives.  Moment to moment to moment . . .

Elimination diet!

Recently a dear friend of mine, Jesse, came to visit Oahu for his birthday.  Among the many things that I love about him (his wit, adventurous & fun nature, taste in music, good food, beer & coffee, his love of all things orange, keen sense of style, the fact that he regularly sends me postcards) is that every year Jesse takes a 30-day cleanse.  He forgoes alcohol and caffeine (among other things) and dedicates the time to the pursuit of all things healthy.  For the past two years, Jesse's 30-day cleanse has culminated with Rachel & my President's Day yoga retreat at Aldermarsh.  This year, as sadly there is no Aldermarsh retreat, Jesse wanted to try something different.  So he scoped out Banyan Botanicals Ayurvedic Cleanse Kit and asked me to take a look at the package.  Ayurveda is a science that takes the individual person with their personal Doshas, in their current state quite seriously.  So while sure, the Ayurvedic Cleanse Kit is okay.... (honestly, fundamentally I have a problem with the one fits all idea Kit given the premise of Ayurveda), Jesse and I spoke and I put together a combination of herbs for him to order and mix; specific to Jesse's doshas.  I gave him a basic kitcheri recipe to follow as part of a 10-day Elimination diet.  He and I will be in touch over the course of his experimentation with Neti pots, herbs and kitcheri (oh my!!!).  

 I am a big fan of reduction (Elimination) diets and a big fan of food.  Most people (through the Ayurvedic lense) should not go on crazy fasts with no food.   In fact, the only Dosha equipped to handle no food is a purely Kapha person.  For the rest, the majority of us, fasting does more harm than good.  I appreciate the Elimination Diet because it slowly eases you in and out of the process of letting go of extras like caffeine, it minimizing cravings and adverse reactions, like headaches, and allows you to eat the entire way.  

 Personally, I try to do the Elimination Diet at the juncture of every season, however, it simply depends on what is going on in my life and if it will do more harm than help.  So, although the Winter season change happened in December, due to finals, holiday travel, etc., I'll be doing my winter Elimination Diet starting tomorrow.  Wish me luck!  If you'd like to join us on an Elimination Diet and need some advice or would like Ayurvedic consultation or follow up, don't hesitate to get in touch.  We can talk in person or via Skype!  Until next week, be happy, be healthy, be you!

Sadhana (practice) - Just do it!!!

There is a lot of controversy in the yoga world about practice.  How much should you practice? Daily?  If so, for how long?  How much is too much?  These are all good questions that I will get to after I take a trip down memory lane.

My first yoga class was in a community center in Illinois during my senior year in High School.  My memory of the experience is rather foggy but I think it was a Hatha class.  During college I took more classes in a variety of styles at different studios around Madison.  It was during this time that I began a home practice.  I did not have a mentor or a teacher or anyone telling me this was a good thing to do, it just made sense.  It wasn't so much that I was a broke college student, having the support of my parents and year round job, it was more that my schedule didn't always line up with classes. 

          
You may not know it, but I am something of an introvert.  My husband likes to call me the most extroverted introvert that he knows (he definitely being TRULY an introvert!!!).  But it is true!  I have always been shy and sensitive.  I have never felt comfortable with big groups of people I don't know.  So, when I had the choice to just practice at home by myself or enter a studio, often I chose to be at home.  Some people really struggle with creating and maintaining a home practice.  I cannot say I relate to this.  It usually takes less than a week away from my home practice when I start to see my life deteriorate in quality all around me.  I have a shorter fuse.  I am not as productive.  I commit prajnaparadha (crimes against wisdom) you know, bad choices, choices that will not make me feel happy and healthy in the short or long term.  This is when you willfully ignore your own inner wisdom or that little voice in your head.  
 
So how often should you practice?  My advice is that you practice every day!  While listening to an interview with Dr. Baxter Bell on Yoga for Healthy Ageing, I heard an interesting quote from Judith Lasater on practice.  When asked how often you should practice, she responded, "Only on the days that you want to feel good."  I agree!  This does not mean you need to practice 2 hours every day. Or if you miss a few days you should beat yourself up over it.  But, making a commitment to practice and sticking with it will have what is called the 'glacier effect'.  The weight of the practice, like a glacier, reaches a critical mass and it slips.  The practice and way of life takes hold of you and will just move you along (Sutra IV.26).  You'll feel so good from your practice that you will keep doing it, you will want to do your practice because you will see the benefits.

How much should you practice?  For me, it was helpful to set a minimum daily requirement (MDR).  It is not much either!  My MDR is ten minutes of asana, five minutes of pranayama and ten minutes of meditation.  That's 25 minutes.  Also, if I am feeling very tired those ten minutes of asana might just be restorative yoga with a bolster, blanket and eye pillow, savasana anyone???  This leads me to my next point; daily practice should make you feel better, not worse.  So if you are tired, let your asana practice be mellow, if you have some steam to work off or need to do some strengthening work, pump up the volume (dance, dance) on your practice and get moving!  Your MDR may be more or less or include different things.  If you don't have a pranayama or meditation practice, no worries (although I would highly recommend them!).  To sum it up, daily sadhana is worth it!  Just do it!

See you next year at LAX!

Ahhhhh, nothing like holiday traveling to bring out the best behavior that humanity has to offer.  Ironically, in the midst of collective societal New Years resolutions I found myself at LAX trying to navigate my way from the American Airlines terminal to the United terminal. 

I have been at airports all over the world, I have traveled places where I cannot speak the language and I must say, navigating LAX was harder than most of the places I have been.  Within 2 minutes at LAX I felt bewildered.  There were no maps to explain the layout of the airport and few airline personnel to be found.  Finally, I found someone to point me in the right direction, a fifteen-minute walk to another terminal where I would have to go through security again.  

While standing in the security line, which seemed pointless as I had gone through security to get on my first flight, I stood behind a man screaming at his wife on a cell phone.  His energy was so negative that I found myself cringing and energetically closing off while physically moving away.  Everyone in the vicinity grew quite.  As I observed the scene unfolding, the man went from screaming at his wife to yelling at the security personnel, and something shifted in my mind.  I noticed my frustration, tiredness, and discomfort with the situation.  I stopped (nirodhah) my inner dialogue, judgment and feelings.  I took a moment in the security line to breath in light and breath out darkness, and I kept breathing until clarity and well being filled my mind. 

In a matter of a minute, one man's rage turned my personal agitation and suffering (duhkha) into presence and compassion.  As it turned out, the man had lost his wife somewhere in the airport and had all her carry on luggage.  Two carry on bags are the limit, so security wouldn't let him through to his flight and to meet his wife who had somehow found her way to the gate. Granted his reaction wasn't fantastic but hey, how would you feel?

One of my teacher's Jo Leffingwell says to use everything as a reminder to come back to the practice.  So if you are sitting in meditation and you hear a practitioner obnoxiously clearing their throat you should thank them in your mind for reminding you to be present.  The things that bother you are invitations to get a little closer to all the uncomfortable parts of yourself that you try so hard to push away.  This allows you to integrate the shadow side of yourself with the one that you put out on display for the world to see. 

Coincidentally, a similar situation unfolded a few days earlier while I was practicing asana in the garage (aka my yoga studio) in my parents' home in Florida.  My adorable 2-year-old niece Shea came in to play in my yoga studio ;)  Her mother Megan looked at me and playfully chimed, "I hope you weren't trying to meditate!" Sincerely, it was no problem and Shea's presence was completely welcome.  She played and I practiced.  Sure, it's a lot more enjoyable to have a little girl’s chatter or the sound of crashing waves to remind you to be present with your self but we cannot always control our environments.  Nor should we!  We can plan for the best, but life always throws you curve balls.  Sometimes those uninvited guests are exactly what you need to face yourself honestly and to grow.

Pema Chödrön explains this concept perfectly.  She writes, " I saw a cartoon that describes this.  A head of iceberg lettuce is sitting in a garden saying, 'Oh no, how did I get in this vegetable garden again?  I wanted to be a wildflower!'  The caption reads, Oscar is born again as a head of iceberg lettuce in order to overcome his fear of being eaten."  Ha ha ha. 

As I am continually working on making friends with my fears and my humanness I have come to the following conclusion...

Traveling around the holidays will always provide a plethora of experiences that will allow me to see all of my dirt and situations that force me to pull out all of my tools in the hopes that I will handle the stress a bit more gracefully. 

All that being said, I am very much looking forward to next year's holiday travel time!  See you at LAX!